Self Esteem Basics

When you have high self esteem you choose things that support and enhance your life, and try to minimize things that ultimately harm you or degrade your well-being.

The way you take care of yourself reflects the way that you value yourself.

Or does it?

While working from home I developed a pain. I was shocked when my Doctor told me I wasn't getting enough sunlight or drinking water often enough!

I was enjoying my work so much I didn't leave my computer for hours. Days would go by that I wouldn't get out into the sun. You would think I'd be aware of the fact that this isn't healthy, but when you get caught up in things common sense can apparently dwindle!

Having good self esteem can be as simple as giving attention to the things that are important. Like your health.

Try the self esteem basics worksheet below to see where you might make improvements in your self care.

For basic health and well-being (which supports self esteem!) you need:

Breathing

Your body needs deep, regular breathing of fresh air. Exercise helps for this!

Stress causes a tightening of the diaphragm and shallower breathes. For good health both physically, mentally and emotionally you need to be able to breathe deeply. To have the capacity to expand and grow and use your creativity, you need oxygen to the brain!

Pure Water

Sip water throughout the day rather than drinking nothing for hours and then gulping down a few large glasses.

This is a weak point for me. I 'wake up' in the middle of something to realize I'm parched and then end up drinking three glasses in a row. But your body doesn't appreciate droughts and floods any more than plants do. A regular, steady supply is what it needs.

Sunlight

At least 15 minutes of sunlight on your skin and closed eyelids is needed every day. Even on a cloudy day - stand outside and let the light fall on your closed eyelids.

People who don't get enough sunlight develop a condition called SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) - its when you feel down and depressed and lose interest in life, but its caused by what a lack of sunlight does to your body. Since your body and mind are one - what happens to your body affects the whole of you, and vice versa.

A regular dose of sunshine helps your body produce vitamin D, which is needed for healthy bones and cartilage. Adequate amounts of vitamin D are only produced in the skin after 10 - 15 minutes of sun exposure, at least two times per week (with skin unprotected by sunscreen. In very smoggy cities or latitudes close to the poles more exposure may be needed to get adequate levels of vitamin D.

Of course you don't want to overdo this either. The dangers of excessive sun exposure are well known, particularly in the southern hemisphere where holes in the ozone allow more UV rays through to earth, resulting in high skin cancer rates.

But its surprisingly easy to get caught up in what you're doing and spend hours in doors, hunched over a computer. Before you know it the sun is going down and you haven't been outside all day!

Good, regular nutrition

As I said above - what happens to your body affects you as a whole. If you want to make a change in your life you can start with ideas, feelings and beliefs, or you can start with the body - each affects the other.

Just as your body needs a steady supply of water, it also needs a regular, steady supply of nutrients. Missed meals, sugar-rich snacks or junk food might fill the gap, but don't supply what your body needs. When you fill up on empty calories your body stays 'hungry' for the vitamins and minerals it needs. A small amount of something healthy every meal is better than a few days of junk food, followed by a few days of super healthy eating.

I recently discovered some benefits to eating more raw food.

Sleep

Regular sleep patterns are better than feast-or-famine approaches where you stay up for nights in a row then crash and sleep for days. Your body is part of nature and it likes rhythm. Find a pattern that works for you and protect it from outside demands.

Read Steve Pavlina's interesting experiment on polyphasic sleep to find out what its like to adopt a different sleep pattern to the rest of the world!

Deep rest

Deep rest is what you find in meditation or activities that allow you to feel connected and still. Some people experience it whilst practicing yoga, tai chi, qi gong or other physical activities that have a spiritual base. Others report getting into 'the zone' during sports like surfing, base-jumping, extreme skiing, or even golf, where the attention becomes focused into one point and everything feels clear, simple and natural.

Whatever method you choose, this type of 'rest' is different to what is achieved through a good night's sleep. It rejuvenates you in a special way that gives you the resources needed for personal growth and creativity.

Self Esteem Basics

Try the self esteem worksheet below to work out whether there are any areas of self care in your life that need more attention.

Each of the self care factors mentioned above are plotted on this chart. Click on the thumbnail to download the worksheet (674 KB pdf file)

Self Esteem Basics Worksheet

On a scale of 0 - 10 rate yourself on each of the factors.

0 = low
5 = good enough
10 = exceptionally good

For example, how do you rate your nutrition? If it is mostly regular and good - then give yourself a rating of 5 or above. It you sometimes eat well and other times eat poorly, give yourself a rating between 0 and 5. If you usually just eat junk food and drink soda, your rating should probably be somewhere between 0-3.

Do the same for each of the factors, marking your score by making a cross or circling the number you choose.

When you have rated yourself on each factor connect the dots to see whether your circle is balanced, or whether there are any areas that need your attention.

No one factor should completely overpower the others.